Freezing Cold in a New Frontier of Suck

A shot of Mt. Erebus outside out McMurdo Station.
A shot of Mt. Erebus outside out McMurdo Station.

So there I was in Cleveland, Ohio, freezing my ass off, fresh out of the hospital and ready (excited too!) to head back home, to good ol’, warm Florida. (The temperature increase from 5 to 75 degrees was soundin’ really nice!)

The concierge at Cleveland Clinic booked our flight for 7:30. However, our flight was delayed, until 10:05.

Now, our little delay would have been cool and all, but considering the fact that we called 20 minutes ahead of time to verify that our flight was on time and nobody told us about the delay puts Frontier in a new category of “suck”. – These guys truly are “Different kinds of animals!” –  ‘Effin sloths! But our seat was big, and that was kind of cool. – And there were no screaming babies, because kids DON’T FLY AT 10:05 AT NIGHT! Actually, it was after 11 before we took off!

As you can imagine, cuss words fell freely from my lips after learning about our great delay. Think about that, out of the hospital, no car, 5 degree weather and now a flight delayed by 2 and a half hours. What a pain in the arse! – These guys should serve complimentary Xanax to everyone on board!

But wait, it gets better! After getting on the plane and being oh so ready for friggin’ take off, there were “avionics problems”. – That sounds minor right? Oh yeah, and a radio didn’t work so they had to fix that. (Who needs a radio to fly?) – Oh and let’s not forget about the legal paperwork that had to be filled out so that we could even take off.

These are all very nerve settling tidbits too tell folks on board a plane when you are about to fly them, including my ass, 300 something miles an hour, 14,000 feet above ground!

So to be honest, I’m writing this as I’m in mid-air on my Frontier flight. I was just served my complimentary tap water. I’m aware that some parts of the world don’t have clean water, and I’m thankful to just get water, but must you really charge $2 for a “complimentary” bottled water after waiting 2 and a half hours? (Really over 3 hours.)


Ryan Hamner

4-time cancer survivor. Musician. Writer. Coffee Drinker.


  1. Carla February 3, 2016 at 4:59 pm - Reply

    Love the “About” Ryan…. You squirrelly dude you!

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